Make your own free website on Tripod.com


Sing-a-Long with Spurious George
Spurious George's Scrapbook
Spurious George Climbs the Family Tree
More Spurious George Politcal Satire
Other monkeys in the troop
Prescient Memories of Sprurious Georges Reign of Error

A Spurious George family history

Laura Bush, while working as a librarian, discovered that her husband's bastard great-great uncle, Chadsworth Walker Bush, a fellow lacking in character and thus purged from official family histories, was hanged for bank robbery and stock fraud in Connecticut in 1899. The only known photograph of Chadsworth W. Bush shows him standing on the gallows platform. On the back of the picture is this inscription: "Chadsworth W. Bush; stock swindler, sent to Connecticut Prison 1893, escaped 1897, robbed the Hartford National Bank six times. Caught by Pinkerton detectives, convicted and hanged in 1899."

After letting the staff of professional image consultants at the RNC peruse the findings, they decided to crop Chadsworth W. Bush's picture, scan it in as an enlarged image, and edit it with image processing software so that the biographical sketch that was sent to the Associated Press as follows:

"Chadsworth W. Bush was a famous entrepreneur in fin de siècle Connecticut society. His business empire grew to include the acquisition of valuable financial holdings and intimate dealings with the securities industry. Beginning in 1893, he devoted several years to government service, finally taking leave to resume his dealings with the financial community.

"In 1897, he was a key player in a vital investigation of missing bank assets run by the renowned Pinkerton Detective Agency. In 1899, Chadsworth W. Bush passed away during an important civic function held in his honor when the platform upon which he was standing collapsed."

And thus passed the very first "hanging Chad."

(adapted from an email "chain" letter)